Why atheists will never unite

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In a sentence, we're too busy getting high off sniffing our own farts. Atheists think we have a monopoly on intellect. We think that we are superior to folks who can't or won't or haven't yet let go of irrational thoughts. We think that anyone who isn't like us is obviously just a moron and not worthy of respect, and may be worthy of hatred and ridicule. We think people's experiences and perspectives are only worth something if they concur with something that happened in a laboratory.

What a bunch of pricks we are.

Of course, we soothe ourselves to sleep as we swallow a philosophical placebo of "freedom." We tell ourselves, only people that agree with us can be truly free because people who have faith in irrational things are slaves. Since slavery is abominable, we fancy ourselves as freedom fighters, crusaders for rational thought and intellect. We tell ourselves that the end justifies the means, so even if we acted like pricks high on our own farts, it's all for the greater good of the world. In this way, we absolve ourselves of our sins yet we don't realize that we've enslaved ourselves in that mindset.

The mindset of, "I am right, you are wrong and I get to judge and mock you for it. We will never be friends and I will never respect you because you're obviously too stupid to be worthy of my friendship and respect," might as well be concrete walls and metal bars. We're removing ourselves from the majority of society, forming our own little gangs, and making shivs out of scraps of what we think is wisdom.

Then, just like herpes, our overinflated sense of superiority spread to other areas. What started with non-faith has migrated to politics. Because we're used to thinking alike when it comes to non-faith, we're shocked to learn that not every atheist thinks alike. Not every atheist supports the same cause. Not every atheist is a liberal. Not every atheist supports abortion. Not every atheist supports healthcare. Not every atheist is against circumcision. 

It angers and confuses us, so we fight each other, because we've all convinced ourselves we're right and infallible, and anyone who dares question that is worthy of a hearty stabbing or two. So, the liberal atheist gang attacks the libertarian atheist gang. The libertarian atheist gang attacks the communist atheist gang. The communist atheist gang attacks the socialist atheist gang. Meanwhile, the one, lone republican atheist cowers in the back corner of his cell, fearing he will be outed as a right winger and that all of the gangs will unite and slaughter him unmercifully....and he's probably right.

Yet, somehow, even with all this internal conflict, we seem to think we can go to battle as a small herd of wounded cats and claim victory over 80% of the global population. Then we wonder why we make no headway and why religious folks think we're all angry, crazy, hateful, and dangerous, but not so dangerous that we have too much of an effect on things. Sure, one or two of us might bitch about a prayer banner hanging in a public school or make a controversial billboard, but, eh....who cares? We're all going to rot in hell anyway.

While Christians hypnotize themselves into believing think they have a monopoly on compassion, forgiveness, and cute little quote books, atheists should be perfectly capable of espousing those ideas. Yet, so often we don't. We quote their book and say, "Judge not, lest ye be judged," to them, just highlight their hypocrisy, but then we quickly turn around and abandon the principle when it comes to ourselves. Worse, we do it to each other.

There aren't a lot of us in the world, at least not that are "out of the closet," yet, we don't stick together. As much as we want to stroke ourselves saying it's okay to be different, we afford the right to be different only to ourselves, which breaks us up into smaller and smaller gangs and causes more and more dispersion. We scattered ourselves about the earth, and because of our self-proclaimed "enlightenment," there we shall remain, with closed minds and closed hearts.

But, hey, look on the bright side. At least we know we're always right.






Image courtesy of http://catmacros.files.wordpress.com/, who likely stole it from someone else, who likely stole it from someone else as well. Pin It

Germany outlaws circumcision. Is this a victory?

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According to this story, German courts have banned infant circumcision because the, "fundamental right of the child to bodily integrity outweighed the fundamental rights of the parents." The procedure has not been completely banned in the country. Boys may decide for themselves later in life if they want to have the procedure done. It also can still be performed if deemed medically necessary.

While, to most atheists, and anyone with a heart and mind of their own, this should seem like a victory over religious barbarism. Unfortunately, we all know just how deeply religion has its diseased talons buried into people and just how infections that disease is as it courses through their veins. There is a sad amount of evidence from other situations that many people are willing to go beyond the law to preserve the cruelty of their faith.

Consider female genital mutilation, which is illegal in the United Kingdom. However, every year hundreds of British girls are genitally mutilated. How do they get around it? Travel or duck. During long school holidays, parents are known to send their girls off to places where the procedure is legal.

What's that, sweety? You want a pony for your birthday? Ok, but he'll have to be made of cotton!

What's to stop parents from doing the same to boys? Worse, since male circumcision can still be performed when a boy has "decided on his own" that he "wants" it done, what's to stop families and communities from pressuring boys into it? There are hundreds of ways to brainwash people into doing crazy things with a few simple tricks. Just like with female genital mutilation, advocates will manipulate scientific data to claim circumcised people are healthier, more sane, do better in school, are more sexually appealing, have MORE sexual arousal, are cleaner, etc., etc. until they have you believing you'd be cruel to deny a child all of these advantages in life.

By the way, at what point is a boy legally and developmentally old enough to decide he wants his cock chopped up?

There is no way that passing a simple law will protect victims from this act barbarism. It will just go into the back alleys and become even more dangerous and damaging. While it is still important to fight against this unnecessary act of cruelty, it must be done by information and not by force. Just like with anything else in life, if you want to influence someone, you have to make them think your idea was theirs all along. Beating them over the head with it usually makes them resist twice as hard. While, as a controversial and provocative topic, it's hard for many of us not to resort to head bashing when we discuss our thoughts on genital mutilation with others, as Maya Angelou said, "People will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

On the bright side, since circumcision will still be legal for medical reasons, in order to keep cutting, people will be lining up to admit that religion is a mental illness. Pin It

Did they have that back then?

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I had come a long way from my humble Catholic school beginnings to a university freshman. As is so often the case with freshmen, I was taking several "core" classes that were required before upper level "major" classes could be taken. One of them was world history. We began with ancient history, Egypt, Greece, Mesopotamia and all that jazz. As the semester went on, we worked our way to Alexander the Great. My professor, Dr. Wilson, who was a brilliant world history teacher, but whom later disappointed me with his acute interested in southern history, made mention that Alexander the Great was speculated to have been gay or bisexual.

A speculation I had long known of, I found it completely uncompelling. Would that it were the same for my classmates. Several small gasps filled the room followed by an awkward silence. Dr. Wilson looked up, with a brow raised, partially aware but partially puzzled that his statement was the source of discomfort. What seemed like an eternity of silence, but was likely the span of a few seconds, was finally broken by the confused question of a prospective frat boy.

"Did they have that back then?"

The class's reaction was split about 50/50 between inquisitiveness and incredulity. I'm sure you can guess which half I helped populate. Dr. Wilson couldn't help but giggle and say, "Yeah, it's not like being gay is a new thing."

The inquisitive half of the class was still silently astonished.

He continued, "I'm not sure what makes people think homosexuality is a new thing. It's been around since the beginning of time and has been referenced throughout history for at least as long as we've had some kind of recorded history."

The incredulous half of us grinned and Dr. Wilson went back to the lesson.

I was unaware how a person could make it through a minimum of 12 years of education, which is generally the case unless a child prodigy like Doogie Howser comes along, and not know that homosexuality is a perfectly normal, natural thing. Perhaps, the students that were perplexed had attended Christian schools, this was in the Bible belt after all. However, the vast majority of students had attended public schools.

While technically, I had attended a "Christian" school, one can no longer paint Catholic schools with the same brush as Christian schools. In Catholic school we learned about evolution, heliocentrism, the big bang, the birth and death of stars, the real ages of the planets. Of course, once we got to religion class, they tried to push, "Yeah well...God made all that stuff happen," but I'll take that over the alternative. We read books like Tom Sawyer (without the recently forced change of Nigger Jim's name, as it should be), Martian Chronicles, Ulysses, My Brother Sam is Dead, To Kill a Mockingbird, and several other books that have topped the Most Banned Books of All Time list. We got a real, quality education.

Of course, I do remember a time when I was very young and also learning about Alexander the Great and asking the same question. The only difference is, at the time, I was in 6th grade. How is it that I spent the majority of my educational life in a religiously affiliated school and I knew more about basic sexuality than kids who had been in public school the whole time? Am I the only one who finds that disturbing? Worse, this was years ago, before some states outlawed the mere mention of anything LGBT. 

At the risk of siding with the Catholic church on anything, I am, to this day, eternally grateful for the education I received through Catholic school. Thanks to the top notch education I received, when I decided to go to public high school, I breezed through, as most of it was a review for me. Likewise, I never had to be the target of the incredulous arrows my classmates' eyes shot at me while asking an extremely naive question like, "Did they have that back then?"

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The Goddess Trap

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Like any other kid of reasonable intelligence who'd been raised Catholic, I began questioning Catholicism and Christianity in general pretty early on. As a kid, I never knew there was such a thing as an atheist. I never realized that it was possible to have no God at all. Had I known that, I probably would have realized the truth much sooner. Alas, I spent a lot of time seeing what else was out there. As a female who, at a very young age strove for equality, naturally, paganism, witchcraft, Goddess worship and all that jazz became my next stepping stone.

When I was very young, girls were not allowed to be altar servers in the Catholic Church. I was always jealous, not because I cared about serving Jesus, or assisting the priest, or sporting those ultra high fashion robes, but I wanted to play with those mystical toys. I wanted to ring bells after incantations, I wanted to carry offerings to the altar, I wanted to light and snuff candles. It seemed exciting and like it would connect me to something greater.

Fast forward a few years, the Pope announced that females could be altar servers, but by that time, I somehow wasn't interested anymore, probably because I had lost almost all interest in the Church. By that time I was sniffing around for a new spiritual home. It wasn't long after that I found witchcraft.

I'd run off with friends to bookstores and sneak pagan books home in my purse. Many of those books were written by men, but that didn't mean they were male slanted the way that Catholicism obviously was. I took great comfort in the idea of there being a feminine power that really controlled the universe. Of course, MOTHER Nature was not a dude and there's a reason people identify her as such.

I read all about the "history" of witchcraft, a lot of which was given a hippy accent, as much of it was revived in the 60s and 70s. I performed "spells," though I never asked for the selfish things most people would expect. I never once performed a love spell nor a money spell nor a revenge spell. I saw The Craft, I didn't want to be responsible for any poor bitches going bald in the locker room, no matter how nasty they were to me.

I did spells to achieve better enlightenment (or so I thought) or spells that thanked the Goddess, the plants, the animals. Though I did once perform a spell to encourage one of my school rivals to understand that being mean to people was harmful to herself and others....I was astounded when it appeared to work the very next day. She had always been rude and nasty to me, suddenly she was kind and polite. Ah, the Goddess listens, indeed!

A note about spells...they're not what you think. They're basically Sunday Mass for one. Depending on what you're focusing your energy on, you pick certain colors of candles, certain scents of oils or incense, certain days of the week or certain moon phases, place certain stones on the altar, say certain "incantations," or a prayer, ring bells at certain times, etc. There's really nothing magical about it.

It all felt very natural. Perhaps because Catholicism is so deeply rooted in paganism and ritual, I felt very comfortable with the tools of this new brand of spirituality I had found. Bells, candles, incense, chalices, tablecloths, all of these things were familiar and so indulged my inner child. I was finally able to be my own altar server and I didn't even have to wear an ugly robe. To top it off, I got to pick my own incense that wasn't the default Catholic Stank scent! How exciting!!

I stayed in this phase a few years until, like with most things, I got too lazy to maintain it. It got to be too much, maintaining a moon calendar, making sure I had all the right candles, scented oils, incenses, cloths, and whatever other embellishments I seemed to believe were necessary. It was all just too much.

I still have all my witchcraft books and even refer back to some of them once in a while. I do still find that certain scents, candles and stones seem to have an effect on my mood, and I enjoy having them around. There is something comforting about having a theme that stimulates all of your senses. I no longer believe I'm "channeling energy" or "casting spells," or doing anything else besides pleasing my senses, which should have always been good enough.

However, one of the main problems I had with witchcraft was the same as with Catholicism. I didn't feel "empowered" like I "should." Just like I never felt Christ's love burning in my heart, I never felt the Goddess' power coursing through my veins. I thought if I just worked harder on it, I'd be a better witch and would one day be filled with this blessing like so many others claimed to experience, but it never happened.

I think it all goes back to my inherently independent spirit. It's even a big joke in the family. Ever since I was old enough to have a sense of self, I've had one, and a very strong one. As young as age three, the family joke was, "There's the right way, the wrong way, and the the Katie way." My mother always joked that she should have named me "Katie Scarlet," after Scarlett O'Hara. My third grade teacher told my parents in a parent teacher conference that, "It's like Katie knows all this is bullshit." I didn't follow the beat of my own drummer, I WAS my own drummer. I had no need to follow or even to be followed.

This spirit is of mine is not interested in begging, beseeching, or humbling herself. This spirit knows that her values and her beliefs and her feelings are the only ones that matter. "Faith" of any kind will never empower this spirit for a very simple reason.

No one is empowered if she's always powerless, left begging, left pleaing, left sacrificing, left to be someone else's pawn in supposedly greater plan only to be discarded like an empty bullet shell just as soon as she's served someone else's purpose; left with the meager hope that someone else's use and abuse of her just won't be too painful, and left to believe that if it is, it's because she has done something unrighteous, or perhaps, regardless of how unbearable it may be, that she should still drop to her knees and thank someone else for making her suffer because she knows it's part of a higher wisdom that she is clearly too stupid, too small, and too insignificant to understand.

Goddess centered religions are no exception.

It's why I feel like so many feminists have cheated themselves by going into these Goddess centered belief systems rather than realizing the whole faith game is a trap. What's the point of giving a sex change to the one that holds you down? You're still beneath someone else, you're still someone else's pawn, you're still begging someone else for things that you could perhaps just as easily take initiative to achieve. If you were in jail for a crime you didn't commit, would you be so much happier being beaten by a female prison guard?

Some will argue that the Goddess is more peaceful and benevolent and doesn't encourage genocide, murder, sexism, racism, and violence, which does seem to be true from what I've read of her, but it's still a cult of the mind. There is no one, central definition of this Goddess, so how do I know? It's not like there's some kind Bible that tells us everything we need to know about her. Suffice to say, she still "has a plan" for you. She still plays favorites with her hurricanes and volcanoes. She still needs to be asked for basic humanity. She still answers extremely selectively. She still works in ways that are so mysterious they make no sense. Comparing God and Goddess is still comparing evils. Why bother with any evil when you don't have to?

Worst of all, it's all so painfully wasteful. I can never get back the years I lost to "faith," all that time I spent begging to be rescued or helped, wondering if anyone was listening and crying when no one did, enduring misery thinking that suffering somehow put me ahead of the game in the long run. All that time I could have been empowering myself to create the reality I wanted. So much damage, that years of counseling may never undo, has already been done.

Some will say that it's my fault, not religion's, for not knowing how to empower myself all along, but those that would are ignoring the self-imposed slavery that any and every faith encourages. Blowing the enemy doesn't make you superior to him....or "her." Pin It

ATTENTION CHRISTIANS: Prayer has ALWAYS been allowed in schools

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The recent news of the Florida legislature's support for prayer in school is enough to make any secularist's skin crawl. There is absolutely no constitutional reason that public prayer should be allowed in school. Christians can lament "oppression" all they want, but the fact is, prayer is something that is impossible to stop unless we become capable of prosecuting thought crime. No one sane, theist or otherwise, would support that.

I think most theists can agree that prayer is something that does not have to be done in groups, nor does it have to be done audibly, nor does it have to be "lead" by someone. It is something that can be done alone, silently, which is often preferable since not everyone likes to broadcast the intimate details of what's in their minds and hearts. So, Christians, let me as you something, and I mean this as a sincere question: even without pre-planned, lead prayers on the morning announcements and before footballs games, what is stopping a student from praying?

Even when I was Catholic, I somehow got the impression that no one could stop me from praying because I could do it without anyone knowing. In fact, I used to try to say the rosary WITHOUT a rosary....I always lost count and started over and then fudged the whole thing, but the fact remains, I didn't have to make any kind of public display out of it. Any student of any religion at any school in any time in history is now, always was, and always will be perfectly free to pray. No one can stop a person from praying. It's something you can do in your mind and heart that doesn't require being done out loud or in a group. If you want people to know, you can, but if you don't, you don't have to.

If you think someone can stop you from praying, then I hate to tell you that your faith isn't as strong as you claim it is. The second you claim someone has stopped you from praying is the second you become a performance artist, a show boater and a village idiot, which is what this is really all about, isn't it?

It's not that you can't have your faith, it's that you can't advertise it in the laziest way possible and be guaranteed not to stand out. No one said you couldn't pray to yourself, pass out Bibles and brochures, wear crosses, invite people to church, lead private prayer circles of your own, or even tattoo scripture on your forehead. But, those things would all take initiative and personal responsibility, which, if you had any of, you wouldn't need some poor, hippy Jew to die for you so you can just live however you want so long as you say, "Thanks," once in a while.

What you really want is anonymity behind yet another sacrificial lamb. You're afraid that, if during the "moment of silence," someone sees you appearing to pray, they might make fun of you, point fingers at you, roll there eyes at you, etc. However, if the quarterback "leads" the group in prayer, you won't be singled out. You'd rather see a bunch of your peers reciting insincere incantations, or at least go through the motions of such, than be thought of as a "freak" for your faith. You're the worst kind of coward. You're a moral crusader as long as someone else leads you in battle, but if your fellow soldiers were all struck down, you'd pee your pants and cry until someone either killed or rescued you.

Let me ask the religious folks another question. Assuming you're not Catholic, and if you are the answer will be, "Yes, some asshole in a hat," can any other living being talk to God for you about what's in your mind and heart better than YOU can? If the answer is yes, I'm sorry to reveal yet again that your faith isn't what you thought it was. So, go ahead, let someone else "lead" you in prayer since you apparently need to "follow" someone else's ideas of what God needs to be begged for. I'm sure the quarterback knows what's best for you, more than you do. Hey, maybe that's why he's the quarterback!

If you're going to believe in God and prayer, is it too much to ask that you believe in yourself? If you have this personal relationship with the Lord, why do you always have to txt him from somebody else's iPhone? If I were God, I'd be kinda pissed to keep getting prayers preceded by "Fwd:" from all my followers. I'd not give them what they asked for just to spite them for being lazy. Maybe that's why, despite Gisele Bundchen's mass prayer emails, the Patriots lost the Superbowl.

Just sayin.... Pin It

Catholic jewelry

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Jews seem to think they have a monopoly on claiming their faith is more than faith, but it's a culture as well. Muslims are increasingly squatting on this territory with their claims of "racism" toward people who think Islam is a big joke worthy of mockery (it is, by the way). Both faiths even get their own special words that are equated with racist bigotry, "anti-Semitic" and "Islamaphobic." Christian faiths don't get to make claims of culture somehow. There seems to be no such thing as anti-Jesusic or Catholiphobia. I guess it's because Christian holy wars are global and not centralized, so they can't be pinned on a particular race, nationality, culture, etc.

Nonetheless, Catholicism is very much a culture, especially if you attended Catholic school. Certain ideas are beaten into you until you think of them as normal, functioning parts of who you are. Many of them take real efforts to extract. Despite my current enjoyment of all things blasphemous, there are still things that I can't bring myself to accept.

I cringe when I see anyone wearing a rosary as jewelry, even as normalized as it has become. I think of how, if this were a Muslim holy relic, heads would literally roll if people were making a frivolous fashion accessory out of it. Why are people allowed to do this to "my culture," but not someone else's?

When I was living in Japan a few years ago, rosaries were all the rage in men's fashion. I hadn't fully actualized being an atheist at the time, but I still found myself at war with the concept of one of "my" holy relics being used as a simple accessory. It did look "cool" on a lot guys, but at the same time, it was sacrilegious to my "culture," even if I didn't fully belong to that culture anymore.

Tokyo is full of small boutiques and accessory shops. One of my favorites, which I'm not sure still exists, was a small ¥1000 costume jewelry shop in Harajuku. Everything in the shop was ¥1000, about $10US. A lot of the jewelry was uninteresting. Typical flowers and sparkles for girls, typical crucifixes and fleur de lis for guys, but there was always one corner of really unique pieces. Every time I visited, I remember seeing one particular rosary, both admiring and despising the brilliant blasphemy it exuded.

It wasn't a true rosary. It didn't have the exact proper arrangement or number of beads (yes, I counted), but it was designed to look like a rosary, so in my mind, the crime had already been committed. As if it weren't sacrilegious enough, purely for its existence, the beads themselves brought an extra line of offense. They were dice, black and white alternating dice. Worst of all, it was made in Italy, the Catholic capital of the world. Holy blaspheme berries, Batman!

Yes, I realize that the Catholic church is no stranger to gambling, but to combine the two in such a blatantly offensive way was unheard of. Yet, for some reason, I had to have it. The day I bought it, I couldn't stop taking out, looking at it, smiling a devilish smile, then putting it away. This continued for quite some time until I eventually threw it in my jewelry pile. I didn't have a jewelry box as I was living pretty much out of a suitcase with minimal furnishings.

I still have this rosary, it's in a box now, and every time I pull it out, that same devilish grin returns to my face. Still, I have yet to wear it. There are a few reasons. The first, and most obvious, is that I don't believe in wearing religious symbols for fashion in general, lest people get the wrong idea. The second is that it doesn't really match anything I have and my accessories are usually perfectly coordinated. The last, and least obvious to anyone that doesn't know me intimately, is that some small Catholic part of me still clings to that idea that it's disrespectful and inappropriate to wear this sacred yet sacriligious relic.

I don't know why I can't seem to let go of it. Recently, one of my few celebrity heroes released his own jewelry line and I found myself thinking slightly less of him when I saw a rosary in his collection (this is after I had already reduced my view of him for endorsing a rather run of the mill, douchey looking jewelry collection; in fact, I think he must have been inspired by the same cheap ¥1000 Harajuku boutique that I used to frequent, but I digress). He's not the only one. I see lots of celebrities, particularly men, wearing them now, and each one of them elicits a knee-jerk, negative gasp of offense from me. I try to reason it out of myself, but it rarely works.

I guess you can take the kid out of Catholic school, but you can't take the beatings out of the kid. Pin It

Thought contraception

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I distinctly remember in eigth grade, after we had sex ed. in Catholic school, which was a pretty hilarious ordeal to begin with, a friend of mine named Carrie (all names changed to protect identity) and I were talking about sex and birth control. She maintained that there was no point in using any birth control at all because, "No method is 100%. If it's God will you get pregnant, then it will happen anyway."

I tried telling her, "What if you use two methods? That's more than 100%"

"But it's 198% out of 200%," she explained, she she was correct mathematically, but not logically.

We went around and around in circles until eventually agreeing to disagree. I never thought much of her argument, but I never forgot it either. Recently, with all the Obama vs. Catholicism contraception kerfuffle, I've been thinking about it a lot. We were just kids, 12 years old, and already one of us had been brainwashed by Catholic thought contraception. We went to the same school and I never had that attitude, which means it came from home.

Her parents were big time, old school, hard core Catholics and all around Jeebus freaks. I even remember her mom bragging about how much going to see Billy Graham "rocked." I also remember, even as a kid, thinking, "Lame." The reigns were tight at their house. Even during Robinhood: Men in Tights, during the scene where Robinhood is serenading Maid Marian in front of a screen and the shadow of his sword makes it look like he has a raging boner that would put John Holmes and Ron Jeremy to shame, her dad said, "I dunno, this is getting suggestive," and made us turn off the movie.

Doubtlessly, the attitude toward birth control was coming from home. What scares me is how early it begins. If she had already been brainwashed by 12, when did the programming begin, age 10, age nine, even younger? It's a miracle any girl graduates Catholic high school without a couple of kids clinging to her teets! I guess God is good at picking which ones really need to have kids.

On a side note, I didn't continue to Catholic high school, but one of the girls I went to school with did, got pregnant, and has a child that is now a student in the very school that I attended kindergarten through eight grade. My mother is a teacher a that school and upon seeing the little girl's last name on her class roster said, "Oh, you must be Angie's daughter (name changed)."

"No," the little girl said confused, "Angie's my sister."

The more I think of the "it's not 100%" attitude, the more it scares me. If you can apply "God's will" to equate a 1% chance with a 99% chance, isn't that just encouraging reckless endangerment? You'd think with the Catholic church's zero tolerance policy toward suicide that reckless endangerment would be strictly governed as well. Sadly, it's not.

Seat belts aren't 100%, nor is a helmet, nor a sidewalk, nor any kind of health treatment, nor medication, nor exercise program, nor riding a unicycle across a tight rope over a tank of sharks and crocodiles. So, if it's God's will for you to die, it will happen. Of course, if you do die, do you burn in Hell for suicide? Technically, it wasn't suicide because you weren't trying to kill yourself, you just happened to die doing something you knew was likely to kill you. Wait, if God considers that suicide, why would God will you to die? Just so he can send you to Hell? What a dick.

So, go ahead, kiddies have sex without condoms. We'll see if it's God's will that you get knocked up, get an STD, or turn into a total skank. Maybe if you're lucky, you'll get all three! How's that for a holy trinity? Pin It